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How do nudists / naturists handle people they meet who they discover are just there for a sexual kink?
How does a practicing nudist / naturist who is at a nudist beach or resort etc… and interacts with a person (or couple or group) who through observation or conversation finds out the strangers are not nudists or even curious about the lifestyle but are just there for a voyeuristic sexual thrill?
Is that offensive? Or a nuisance? Or does it sort of come with the territory?
I imagine I’d find it frustrating if the people sat next to me on the beach were giggling and inappropriate and obnoxious.
As a nudist, I never try to guess or judge the motives of the people around me. What counts is behavior. If the behavior is inappropriate, I speak to the person about that. Here is an example:
I would like to share an experience I had Monday February 23. 2015 at Bonny Doon Beach in Santa Cruz County, California. A lady friend and I were enjoying the beach in our natural nude state, playing a game of Scrabble, when I noticed a that a guy sitting nearby was not-too-subtly masturbating as he watched us. After a while it was hard not to notice him. I chose my words carefully as I walked over to talk to him: I said, “I would feel much more comfortable if you would save your masturbation for the privacy of your home. When I was five years old, my mother taught me that it is rude to masturbate in public.” He said not a word in reply, so I wasn’t sure he even understood English. A few minutes later he put on all his clothes and left the beach.
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LikeDislikeFor public places like the nude beach, these types do sort of come with the territory. There are always those few who show up for the wrong reasons, whether it’s for voyeurism, exhibitionism or sexual thrills. They may or may not call themselves a nudist. At a public beach, anyone can be there as long as they aren’t breaking the law / rules. These types of people show up to private clubs as well, but that’s much less common since clubs have a screening process as well as strict rules about behavior. But keep in mind that some nudist clubs have more of a swinger atmosphere than others, even if they prohibit public sexual behavior. At real family-oriented clubs, you’re much less likely to find “sexual kink” people.
Sometimes these types of people are indeed a real nuisance, though as Rich points out, there is intent and then there’s behavior. Someone may show up for sexual reasons, but not engage in any behavior that makes that apparent, or engage in behavior that bothers other people. You might start chatting with someone and then realize they are there for sexual reasons. This is frustrating if you’re a naturist trying to meet like-minded people, but rest assured that there are also plenty of true nudists or naturists at any beach. It’s best to just end that conversation and move on.
At a family-oriented nudist club, these types can get reported for making people uncomfortable or making sexual advances, etc.
For those who are actually behaving inappropriately or making others uncomfortable at a public beach, naturists have different ways of dealing with that. On public beaches such as Haulover nude beach in Florida, many naturists try to promote basic nude etiquette to visitors. They’ll have an info table, hand out fliers and have a team of volunteers ready to correct bad behavior.
On an individual level, some naturists will approach people about their behavior, as Rich did, but others try to ignore it instead, as they may expect someone else to deal with it! Or they might also not feel safe or comfortable confronting someone. In that scenario it’s best to get a few people together to approach them. I’ve written specifically about the etiquette / behavior problems with photography at public beaches and how naturists deal with it – http://youngnaturistsamerica.com/nude-beach-photography-issues-naked-family-pics-nudist-beach-photo-images/
At a private club, you would just inform the management about bad behavior.
All of this is generally about more serious infractions like having public sex, making unwanted sexual advances, taking photos without consent, etc. If the behavior is something more innocuous like “giggling,” well most would probably just relocate if someone is being too loud or obnoxious.
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